I received this letter from a woman in another country. I sobbed the entire way through. I could feel her sadness, her trauma, and her brave Mama heart.
This. This story is the story of the true grit and strengh of a woman, of a Mother, of a human being. We have the power to change our minds. We have the inner strength to hold on and to do hard things. This is proof that sometimes people think about leaving this earth because life is so brutal sometimes and we think we can't possibly make it through but we do, we can....we can make it through.
But......here's your proof. You can make it through. Everything you need is inside of you. Sometimes we just need to read anothers words to remember this, to inspire us. to light a fire inside of us to keep us powering through.
This is your reminder to stop complaining about little things in your life. Stop complaining about your kids jumping on the furniture, or your spouse not helping with the kids, or your weight, or your messy house. Because someone out there in the world today is going through something awful. Like really awful and I know that you wouldn't want to walk in their shoes. Life is messy and everyday life is hard. The laundry, the kids, the chores, the relationships, the job....it's all hard but you're alive. Find things to be truly grateful for each day.
I asked this woman if I could share her letter so that she could help to inspire other Mom's out there and she said, Yes. I'm sharing it anonymously per her request but please send her and her babies so much love, healing, prayers, and hope for their future. Thank you!!
Love always, Nik
"Hi Nik, I don’t know if you’ll ever read this message, but I really hope you do, as I need you to know you’ve saved a life. I am a single parent of 16 month old twins. Following the delivery of my twins I was diagnosed with heart failure, sleep apnea and chronic fatigue. Leaving me to feel very unwell and on most days struggling to leave the house. This is in addition to already battling anxiety and depression. When my babies were 6 weeks old my then girlfriend (who is their other mum) left me and I was forced to leave the family home with my twins. We were homeless and sleeping at various peoples houses with my twins on the floor in baskets. That was for four months until I finally managed to find a landlord that would take a single parent on benefits. My situation meant I was unable to return to my job as previously planned due to financial problems and the inability to afford child care. I now rely on the government for money to raise my children which makes me feel like a failure. For the past few months I’ve had a consistent idea in my head that my children would be better off without me and living with their other mum who they stay with at weekends. I felt as though the best option for them would be if I were to take my own life. They are young enough that they would never remember me and they probably wouldn’t ever notice I was gone. I was pretty adamant to go through with ending my life. I thought everyone would get over it eventually and it would be like I was never here. I read an article you wrote “What Suicide Loss 'Looks' Like” and that made me see what kind of impact my actions would have on my family and ultimately my children. It had such a huge impact on me. And made me realise that my current purpose is to protect and love my children more than anyone else could. Even if I feel like crap, letting my children think I abandoned or walked out on them is something I could never do and I never considered they could have grown up to feel this way until I read your article. I never thought they would forever question my love for them. This has completely changed my perspective. I’m very sorry for the loss you went through. I want you to know that the messages you have put out there since your loss have saved two little children from losing a parent. Thank you."